All I Want Is A Normal Life

On this eve of the first of the new year, I get to opportunistically reflect on the things I have, the things I want, and my purpose in life. I’ve always wanted to be “normal” and have a “normal life” (though most people I know would laugh if they heard me saying that, since my life bears little resemblance to the boring slog that most people think of when they hear “normal” — something I think of more as “quiet desperation”).

Ever since I was a little kid, I didn’t fit in. I looked like a boy until I was 9 and had to get into the habit of asking for the “ladies’ room” because service staff always directed me to the men’s room. I was too tall. I had no friends. Kids made fun of me. I wouldn’t wear a “training” bra and ended up needing a real bra earlier than anyone else I knew. Boys would dare each other to ask me out and then run away laughing. I got picked last in any athletic event I was forced to participate in. “Normal” seemed like this unattainable golden state that everyone else existed in… so when I got to pick my name, I decided that, by hook or by crook, I was going to be normal.

And that’s how I got to be “Normal.” And it really fits me, I think, since I have a regular job that I go to every day at roughly the same time. I have fairly un-exceptional thoughts on a day-to-day basis. I’m not very fashionable, but I’m also not notably unfashionable. I have hobbies like normal people: hiking, camping, hanging out with friends, blogging, photography. Yes, some of my hobbies are un-normal: collecting taxidermy, listening to Cracker all the time, modeling for unconventional photos (right), camping in the desert and applying spark to combustibles.

One thing I think I want to look into for the new year is what really *is* “normal life.” I want it… but do I? And what is it to other people? So I’ve set up a Google alert and will set out to figure out what a normal life is. Wish me luck.

From the site: Cutethingsfallingasleep.org

So, you gained a little bit this week.

Is this what you expected? If so, today’s a great day to make a fresh start. If you’re stumped, talk with your Leader to assess your week and get advice on how you can make some changes to get back on track for next week.

Good luck in the coming week.

I went up a half a pound on the day of the weigh-in. I know why this is and I’m not too discouraged. First, PMS. Second, I’m retaining water (because of PMS, salt intake the day before, incredible alcohol consumption the previous day, and a change in exercise). And Third, I used all my weekly allowance points, which I just found out are optional not expected. On the plus side, I exercised a hell of a lot and expect these sore muscles to turn into bigger, more efficient muscles.

For the first few days, it seemed like the number of points I got just wasn’t going to be enough. I like to eat toast. The points system doesn’t really allow for a lot of toast. What it does allow for is a lot of vegetables. And about vegetables, I’m kind of meh. So there’s that. But I’m still committed.

I think making use of the WW community online will be helpful, or at least I hope so. Seems like a lot of people on there aren’t all that friendly, even though I found a blogger who seems pretty neat: “Obligatory Dorito“. She lives in Austin and seems to have similar taste as I do (mostly vegetarian, humus and beer) and also has an interest in posting recipes and shopping lists on her blog. Perhaps we can share experiences and grocery lists. *grin*

Anyways, I’m going to bed early tonight since I’m still trying to get well. Emily said maybe it’s my body getting rid of the toxins, but for two freakin’ months?!? Holy macaroni! I think it’s about time I see a Chinese Doctor. Barak recommended one, so I’ll be scheduling some time with her after the new year.

Brigitte Dale did this cute piece. I love it.

a screen grab of the Guanabee post featuring a screen grab of The Onion's article

As you all know by now, I’m an absolute JUNKIE on the crushing financial disaster that we’re all going to live with every day for the rest of our natural lives, day in, day out, regardless of whether this massive bailout happens (though certainly we can live longer, more significantly worry-filled years if the bailout does go through). side note: man, that was a long sentence! So when I saw that my favorite blog evar, Guanabee, had said something about it, well, you know I just had to perk up my ears!

I just happened to visit The Onion (America’s finest news source) earlier today and saw that article down under the fold. Top news stories for the day were about Hurricane Katrina coming back to apologize for destroying everything, and some news of China’s voluntary astronaut program, with no above-the-fold mention of the financial crisis or the presidential election. What happened to the hard-hitting news days of “American People Would Be Outraged If They Understood Enron”, which single-handedly piqued my interest in the energy crisis and left a lot of high-power exec types bathing in money while shareholders were left eating canned peas and fishsticks for dinner?

Where has The Onion of old gone?

And Guanabee tries their hand at political news, but it’s hard. I don’t really know that this article is about the bailout, though it sure sounds like another case of the rich getting off without so much as a scratch… but that’s the same with celebrities in jail or any other insane double standard of rules. I ask you, where was this quick response when people were dying in New Orleans? So, right there with you, Guanabee, but I don’t know if The Onion deserves a heck of a lot of props for what I feel is pussyfooting the bailout issue.

On the other hand, it’s a satire news site and I’m taking it all way too seriously, kind of like a cat very seriously stalking a piece of tissue on the ground. Mraow.

Related reading:
The Guanabee post
The Onion Post
The Holy Bailout Plan